Last night I decided to take a walk just so i could recollect my thoughts. It's finally starting to get a little warmer out and the darkness around me feels like a warm blanket of solitude which allows me to think and think clearly. I circled most of the town and came back and walked into the enclosed area of crunchy snow that only a few weeks ago was an outdoor ice rink. After taking only a few steps into the ice rink I saw something on the ground that caught my eye. It was a leaf, of some sort, shaped like a heart, and sunk into the snow a bit. I went to pick it up and see the design that it left in the snow but soon realized that it was frozen into the snow and former ice. That leaf kind of reminds me of how I feel right now. I have been here so long standing still in a world that is frozen all around me that I can't move; nestled tightly into the ice and coldness thats all around me. I think that this is the stage and place that alot of people here are in right now. There is, and has been so much noise and clatter around us for so long now and as it has all started to quiet down we are some how frozen there where we landed. There is so much bustle and activity that people don't seem to know who they are anymore and those around them have trouble defining it as well. So many friends of mine seem like empty vessels right now. I see no life or deed within them; only a faint image of who and what they used to be. Now we all seem like hearts frozen in the dark, cold winter ice. As I reflect on this, i think once again back to the leaf and how it is quite possible that it may not have even been visible a month ago, possibly covered in layers of ice and snow and although it is still forced to remain there, it is once again visible, which is a start. Spring is coming and with that, hearts un-thaw and personalities return to their former possessors. This is my prayer for us here, in a quiet university in the middle of Saskatchewan, that with the spring and warmth, so our hearts will be warmed and life and energy return to each of us.
Sunday, March 20, 2011
A Frozen Heart
Last night I decided to take a walk just so i could recollect my thoughts. It's finally starting to get a little warmer out and the darkness around me feels like a warm blanket of solitude which allows me to think and think clearly. I circled most of the town and came back and walked into the enclosed area of crunchy snow that only a few weeks ago was an outdoor ice rink. After taking only a few steps into the ice rink I saw something on the ground that caught my eye. It was a leaf, of some sort, shaped like a heart, and sunk into the snow a bit. I went to pick it up and see the design that it left in the snow but soon realized that it was frozen into the snow and former ice. That leaf kind of reminds me of how I feel right now. I have been here so long standing still in a world that is frozen all around me that I can't move; nestled tightly into the ice and coldness thats all around me. I think that this is the stage and place that alot of people here are in right now. There is, and has been so much noise and clatter around us for so long now and as it has all started to quiet down we are some how frozen there where we landed. There is so much bustle and activity that people don't seem to know who they are anymore and those around them have trouble defining it as well. So many friends of mine seem like empty vessels right now. I see no life or deed within them; only a faint image of who and what they used to be. Now we all seem like hearts frozen in the dark, cold winter ice. As I reflect on this, i think once again back to the leaf and how it is quite possible that it may not have even been visible a month ago, possibly covered in layers of ice and snow and although it is still forced to remain there, it is once again visible, which is a start. Spring is coming and with that, hearts un-thaw and personalities return to their former possessors. This is my prayer for us here, in a quiet university in the middle of Saskatchewan, that with the spring and warmth, so our hearts will be warmed and life and energy return to each of us.
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